Want You to Know

Want You to Know

Foreword: You, I and Guns are our souls…
------------------thuyduongmm19--------------------

I strode fast, toward the highway. The sky was painted such a grey but I myself also didn’t hope it to be better. I carried a heavy suitcase which is full of lead, it weighed down my hand and left some red lines on my palm. Hurt and hurt, and as a result, I mostly lost feelings on my hand. But I knew that if I left the suitcase, I will have to suffer from a much much more terrible pain.

She followed me, and kept silent. Her hand held my coat and put there a line of warmth, smooth, and warm. The wind blew her hair so hard. She leaned on me, slowly.

-Don’t worry – I comforted her – its going to be late, so wind is hard. We just need to find a safe place, and things will be alright.

-Yes….

She replied softly, her cheek was right next to my coat. My hard coat was made by leather, I was just afraid it would hurt her smooth skin. But she didn’t complain. I could be ensured that she was still okay, at least.

I looked around to see if there was any place around that we could stop by. A desert that was full of stones and sands which showed the dark red. Some rolls of weed were blown along the way within some kinds of rubbish. I looked at the horizon, how small and blue it was… does that place have a space for us?

An old newspaper was stuck under my shoes. And I could read clearly the big title:

“Most-wanted! 2 gangsters burnt a wine store”

-“A wine store?” – I put on the air a sarcastic laugh – its better “wine smuggling” and “criminals’ guarantee”.

But I stopped the line of thinking when the small hand on my shoulders started to trembling.

-Are you cold? – I asked, put the suitcase down and about took my coat off to give her.

-Uhm… it’s okay…

She stopped me, and leaned closer on me, so close that I even could feel her heartbeats. I fondled her cheek, her neck and then used my hand to cover her back.

I want you to be with me forever, don’t you know that, my love? I try my best to show you how much you mean to me, using these clumsy acts. Do you know how much you mean to me? Just need you to be with me, all the thick walls will become nothing to me. Please stay by my side every time, so I can know that you are there and my heart will be calm…

I love you…so much…

A small cloud of dust appeared. It was getting dark and included tiredness, I could hardly recognize what it was.

-Its “them” – said her gently – run away, please!

I knew what I could stand against and what I couldn’t. I held her hand and ran, pulled her toward. A long pursuance took my energy away, I felt like my legs were cut down and disappeared. They needed rest. And I really didn’t know how I could go so far and still held her in my hand.

Horns yelled loudly, pushed such a heavy sound on my ears. I still ran, and still held her hand.

We needed to escape…

I started to do a thing that I never did before: praying for God.

But…

Seemed like God really didn’t exist, and my legs didn’t obey me anymore. I fell down on the road. The hard of cement told me such a difference between it and her smooth hands. She also fell down, and was totally exhausted. She breathed so hard.


-Give me the suitcase! – Said her softly, but very strong – and you, please run away!

But I held the suitcase and refused, seriously:

-YOU are the one who drives the car and I’m the one that sits beside you. If that car goes to the end, I will still sit there!!!

She said nothing but looked at me deeply. Her short hair was blown, again.

She turned back, took the suitcase from my hand very fast, opened it and held a shotgun by her hands. She shot at those cars that were chasing us. I heard sounds of bullets’ covers dropped on the road. Those bullets… they had colour of sunshine. But they could never be as beautiful as the shining of her hair.

I also took out a shotgun.

Now the suitcase was so light, but no one will need it.

The cloud of gunpowder flied around her forehead. And I told myself that if we could get rid of this, I would never let her touch any gun or bullet again, never!

I looked at her. Her shooting skill was so good and it made me nearly jealous.

But don’t worry, I will be by your side…

A big car suddenly appeared, so did lots of people.

I heard very strange sounds… and felt a small fire zoomed right next to my ear, hot… very hot. And not just only one, many… so many of them……

A wave of bullets was above us.

I shot still though, and her head suddenly leaned on my shoulders.

What are you doing??!! Hold your gun, hurry up! HURRY!!

…

Suddenly..

So…. strange…. I hear no sound, even just a small scratch or the wind. And I feel like…. Like nothing really disappeared, like we never ran away, never joined any gun fight….

The dream is inside the roses, and ghosts will no longer be the present…

First drops of rain season…

No…. they look like snows, right, snow… in this hot weather and from the grey sky above. The candle between us will always last… just like you never knew how much you truly mean to me… never knew…

Guns… dozens of souls, haunting, dreams, hope, even our spirits and minds are within them, those guns.

I lay down, next to you. This pool of blood… is it yours? Or it is mine? We are falling down, right?

Right now, right here, just this moment…
when I fell down, I touched your hand… and I can feel still the smooth and warm skin of you.

Right now, right here, in this moment…

\

I look into your eyes…. The beautifully icy blue eyes…the blue must be from the deepest place of sea, from the highest place of sky… the beautiful blues of you…

I could take my life and be happy to drown in your eyes…

This pool of blood, where my look touches yours. Do you know what it means?

Do you know?

Even this is the end, even this is blood… even….

Know…

This is…

…everlasting.

-30-06-2005-

thuyduongmm19@yahoo.com

the whole fiction belongs to me in all kinds of meaning so if you are going to use this fiction, you MUST get my allowance.